What women want

I’ve recently been involved in the following conversation:

- Normally, the system should automatically send out one mail after the order has been placed.
-          But what I get is three mails actually.
-          Can you show them to me, please?
-          There you go. These are my three mails.
-          Ok, I see. Three - that’s too much. It should be one only. Out of the three, can you tell me which one you prefer?
-          I’ll think about it and will let you know.

I dreamt away. I imagined we were talking about “males”. “The system should automatically send out one male after the order has been placed.” “Out of the three males, which one do you prefer?”

I’m sure many a fe-male would appreciate such an option: get three males sent automatically and choose one of them. What a luxury! Which one would you choose? The most handsome? The one with the nicest figure? Or the one with most charm? The one with the nicest smile or the thickest wallet? Or maybe the one who was genuinely interested and really meant it as a question when he asked “But how are you?, with emphasis on you? Maybe you’d choose the one who’s read the most books? Or the one who hardly ever read any, but enjoyed reading financial statements before going to bed? Or one who was good at grass hockey…

I got a little carried away, imagining that if modern technologies make it possible for systems to automatically send out males and put them at fe-males’ doorsteps, then I’d send three carefully-chosen specimens, gift-wrapped, to a girlfriend in distress. I assume free returns would be part of the service?

But how do you judge? What is this one most important feature that a girl looks for in a male?

The answer is quick. It’s in the name already.

What a girls look for in a male is an E. We like getting e-males.

“E” stands for “enigma”. Fe-males seem to be particularly interested in cryptograms: males that are not easy to decipher, men that carry an air of mystery around them.  Am I right?

The next question is: do men prefer fe-males, Φ-males or fee-males, and what is the difference?